Today is a busy, happy day. Today is my middle brother's birthday. I'll have to call him this morning because he goes to work at one and is not allowed to talk on the phone while he is there (unless he is on break.) He is a big, burly teddy bear of a man who likes to think he is tough but is really just a big softie. He is the one who makes the best pecan waffles. Here's our last photo of him with Moma the week after her 90th birthday...

This afternoon I have an appointment to get my hair done. Yippee! I am way overdue for a highlighting job.... Been feeling dingy and frumpy for weeks.

Then tonight begins a two day Ladies Conference with guest speaker Lisa Bevere! Much to do so I'll leave you with another quote that leapt of the page of her book at me... from the chapter entitled Fighting With Wisdom:

"Wise women lay hold of God's promises and let go of life's disappointments. Foolish women hold onto disappointments as they fight to prove themselves right. Wise women understand you never win with bitterness and offense as companions."

I'm taking my book this weekend. Maybe I'll have  a chance to get her to sign it!

PTL I finally feel halfway decent again! Now I have a mountain of laundry to catch up on. But first I want to remember:

One year ago today my life changed forever when my mother stepped out of this life and into eternity with Jesus. Sometimes I miss her so much I don't think I will be able to stand it... but somehow I do. Moma told me many times in her last months not to be sad when she was gone. My response was always the same... I'd tell her I couldn't promise never to be sad, because I would miss her. But I would always assure her I would be okay. And I am.

Memories of times with Moma more often bring a smile than a tear these days.  For I am blessed to have had a mother who filled my life with memories of love and home and laughter. She showed me what love looks like. I could write a post so long xanga wouldn't hold it filled with memories of the special times Moma and I have spent together. I could write about some of my earliest childhood memories... sitting on the kitchen cabinet learning to cook, baking a cake that looks like a rabbit with colored coconut and jelly beans for eggs at Eastertime, times at the sewing machine learning to sew. I still have the first sewing project we made together... a green cotton apron with rickrack at the hem... the way she made birthdays special, trips to Austin every summer and fall, late night boy advice... I could write about the early years of my life a wife... like the day she helped me can vegetables from my first garden while I was in labor with my son.... Or I could write about the many "girls day out" shopping trips through the years... first just she and I, and then my daughter too.... those were always special times.

But none of those are my favorite memory of our times together.  No! The most precious memories of all are not about shopping, or childhood lessons, but times when we shared our faith. Times when we sang and praised the Lord together. For during those times we were more than mother and daughter ~ we were sisters in Christ. I especially treasure that last year when Moma was too weak to stand for long and we took her with us to church in a wheelchair. I loved catching her out of the corner of my eye hands lifted to the Lord!  And nothing could be more precious than being with her when she slipped into eternity.

From my earliest memories, until his dying day, whenever the subject of mothers came up my Daddy would always get misty-eyed and say, "Your mother is the best friend you'll ever have." And he was right! I would have so loved to meet his mother, but she died before I was born. But I'm thinking he had that same kind of bond with her.

On Daddy's first birthday in Heaven Moma and I went out to eat catfish in his honor... something he especially loved to do. So today I am going to try to think of something Moma loved and do that!

“Death's power is limited.

It cannot eradicate memories or slay love.

It cannot destroy even a threadbare faith

or permanently hobble the smallest hope in God.

It cannot permeate the soul and it cannot cripple the spirit.

It merely separates us for awhile.

That is the only power death can claim - no more!"

Donna Vanliere from her book, The Christmas Shoes

10:07 a.m.Feeling a bit better today. The fever and chills and body aches are gone.  Now its' mostly all just concentrated in my ears nose and throat. I feel like I'm trying to breath underwater. Needless to say I have no energy.... Heading back to bed now. Gonna try to read a bit more of my Lisa Bevere book if I can stay awake. I'll leave you with a quote from it that lept off the page at me yesterday:

"Adam's side was opened and the woman Eve was created, just as the side of Jesus Christ was opened and His church was brought forth."

Somehow I've never connected the two before. Sure colors the scriptures from Ephesians 5 on marriage with deeper meaning!

4:10 p.m. Woke up from my second nap of the day feeling parched, but much better. I feel like I could drink a gallon and a shower is starting to sound inviting... Just to be safe, I'm going to laze around the rest of the day. Hopefully tomorrow I will be all better!

Today I am really, really missing my daughter. We used to meet her for supper at least once a week and I haven't seen her since Christmas.  Living 700 miles apart stinks! I am so glad I was born in this age of technology! At least we can talk on the phone. I can't imagine the pioneer days when often families moved West and were rarely heard from again. Missing Moma too...

Went back to bed after getting hubby off to work this morning. My head is full of crud... allergies I'm guessing, but Claritin doesn't seem to be fazing it. As much as I don't want to, I am forcing myself to get on the tread mill now. Thinking about it certainly won't melt away any pounds and hubby asked me about it at lunchtime. I want to be able to say yes when he asks me again.

Today will be a lazy day at home. I cleaned house yesterday and tomorrow will be busy with church and family events.

Friday for the first time in months and months,  I dusted off my treadmill and walked on it for 30 minutes. I don't live near a Curves anymore... the nearest one is 35 miles away... I miss that... but it will be gardening weather soon... and my tiller should arrive any day now... until then its just me and my treadmill.

I also paid attention to what I was putting in my mouth. Keeping a food diary/calorie count this week has been very eye opening ~  It made me come face to face with the fact that I have been medicating myself with sweets and comfort foods. No wonder I have packed on the pounds since the move! So I purposely made smarter choices.... smaller portions, more fruit and water.

My goal is to stop the mindless eating and get moving again on a regular basis. The question is, can I stay motivated and stick with it for more than a few weeks? Starting is always easy for me. But when the new wears off ... that will be the challenge. It is probably going to take me a year to get to where I want to be.

Things went very well at the doctor yesterday. He adjusted my HRT dosage a teeny bit and we talked about how to safely lose weight. Can you believe he told me to eat less and exercise more!  He also recommended a free online tool to use to easily track calories and keep a food diary:  MyFitnessPal.com 

Now that the fog seems to be lifting from my brain, it's time to stop lazing around and get moving again, not to mention making smarter food choices. No more pizza and waffles in the same day! Seems like a lifetime ago I went to Curves most every day.... As we all know, the best exercise is the one you will do, so in an effort to make my first day of purposeful exercise fun ...

Today I am taking my niece (who just turned 14) for a day of shopping in the big city ... just us two.  Since she homeschools we didn't have to wait for the weekend and fight the crowds. Actually, this is her birthday present from hubby and me ~ but it sure fits nicely into my plan to get moving again. Wish Em lived close enough to go with us...

EDIT: I think we can safely say we got our exercise. We walked (rather briskly I might add) all over the mall for almost two hours, then after lunch we hit a relatively new shopping center. I just hope she enjoyed the day as much as I did!

One of the things I love most about our bedroom is the the East window. Our bed sits against the North wall so most mornings I lie in bed and watch the sunrise.... I have seen some beautiful ones in the past 9 months.  Violet seems to love it too for she often sits in the window sill and supervises as the world wakes up. Broncomom's recent silhouette pictures inspired me to grab my camera and attempt to get a decent shot of her this morning. I love how you can see how the warmth of her body defrosted the window around her, as well as the textures of her fur and the voile curtains. These two pictures were taken only minutes apart but the difference in natural lighting made a world of difference.

Later this morning I have my annual poke, prod and squish session. Oh the joys of being a middle aged woman! What do you bet this sunrise will turn out to be the best part of my day!

The sense of smell is one of the strongest triggers of memory known to mankind. Has it ever happened to you? You caught the scent of something and immediately you are submerged in a moment from your past.... That happened to me the other day. Funny how particular smells can do that....

My nephew was cooking some breakfast sausage and immediately I was transported to my parent's kitchen and memories of my Daddy. In my minds eye I could just see him lifting browned (or maybe i should say blackened) patties from the hot skillet with a fork and draining them on paper towels, while he slathered two pieces of white bread with Miracle Whip... I couldn't help but smile.  Whether in a sandwich or on his plate at breakfast, my Daddy liked his sausage thinly sliced and cooked within an inch of being burned, a technique Moma perfected through the years. I married a man who doesn't like extra well done anything and rarely eats sausage at all ~ my guy ia a bacon man. So it is that the sagey smokey smell of cooking sausage came to be associated exclusively with my Daddy. 

Hard to believe he has been gone for 27 months and 16 days....

I spent most of Thursday in the kitchen and or at my desk making valentines, heart shaped cookies, and fudge.  This is the most creative I've been in quite awhile. Here is a sample of my handiwork.

I found some red toile blank note cards that I was able to embellish and then personalize for the ladies. The fudge is my treat to share and I made the cookies for the kids Valentines and wrapped them in celophane with heart smiley faces on it. Now to pack my lunch and head out the door to board meeting.

Wishing you all a Happy Valentines Day!

WARNING: Very long post!

Sunday was a special day. Hubby's brother and his wife were being recognized as new Elders at their church after serving there as deacons for many many years. Since their service started almost an hour after ours, we slipped out when they dismissed the kids for children's church and went to theirs. Afterwards we all ganged up at their house for potroast and fried chicken. I couldn't help thinking about what a change the Lord had made in my BiL's life. When hubby and I first married I thought he didn't like me because he wouldn't talk to me. I later learned he was just very quiet and rarely spoke to anyone. Now here he is thirty years later and he is a greeter at the front door every Sunday! (Not to mention being a leader.)

Sunday evening we led our first small group since we've been in West Texas. Basically our group is all the couples from the new member's class and pastor and his wife. Not all small groups meet at the same time so it is up to each group to deal with child care. Sunday night we had eleven adults and four children between the ages of 18 months and 5 years. The kids were pretty subdued since it was their first time in a new place. Violet was a big hit with them! Everyone engaged and even the quiet ones participated when we split up men and women for prayer time. We ran over a good thirty minutes beyond what we had planned. I'm thinking as we build relationships with these young couples maybe we'll get to be surrogate grandparents to the little ones.

That night it began to rain just a group was winding up and rained through the night. We got about 3/4 of an inch of much needed rain. The first in almost 4 months. I'm calling it birthday rain!

Monday I felt like quite the birthday princess all day long. If ever there was any doubt in my mind that I  mattered to my brothers or hubby's family... there can be no doubt! The day began with an early morning phone call from one of my brothers and ended with another just before bedtime. In between not only did the other two call, but I also got to talk to both my kids several times, RayRay and my friend Kaye from Central Arkansas. Not to mention all the sweet comments my xanga friends left me and cards I received in the mail. The next time my SiL asks her "Tell about your best and worst birthdays" this one will definately be the one I'll think of.

Turns out my inlaws are quite a sneaky bunch! My SiL, TexasMelody had asked weeks ago to take me out for lunch on my birthday. Since I live on the opposite side of town from Lubbock, the plan was for me to meet her at her house and then go together on to Lubbock in her car. I never suspected a thing Sunday at lunch when she asked if I wanted to skip breakfast and be in Lubbock for an early lunch, could I be at her house at ten. I walked right into a surprise birthday brunch!  

All the ladies from our Friday board meetings were there plus the gal I've been shopping with. I was told it was my nephew and his wife who had decorated the kitchen and baked the birthday cake. They had a red and white theme going complete with balloons, chinese lanterns and chocolate dipped strawberries on the cake! (I love them!) The table was spread with an assortment of sweet breads and fruit and meat, hot tea and punch. It was lovely!

My three year old nephew and four year old niece took great pride in singing Happy Birthday to me many times that morning. The little boys would clap after each rendition. They sounded like they were singing a round for they never quite got started at the same time. It was precious. Then when the ladies started giving me gifts, the three year old got a piece of tissue from one of the gifts I'd already opened and wrapped up his toy motorcycle and gave it to me. He seemed delighted when I thanked him with a birthday kiss.

Hubby was out on a job location so afterwards I rode to Lubbock with my MiL and the other SiL who didn't host the party. My niece had a dentist appointment and then we stopped at Hobby Lobby. I got home to find my sweetie had left me a dozen roses, and a mushy card on the bar. My oldest brother had called so I called him back and we had a nice visit. A trip to the mailbox yielded more birthday cards and a package from my son. The Sarah Plain and Tall DVD trilogy I'd been asking for.

That evening we all met at the inlaws, men and all, for my family birthday supper. My FiL didn't realize I had opened most of my gifts that morning at the brunch and was concerned I didn't have many gifts. Bless his heart! Little did he know I already had quite a haul. We had chicken spaghetti and salad with homemade ranch dressing, grilled pork chops for the men, and my niece made the requested black forrest cake. Mmmmm Chocolate and cherries.... doesn't get much better than that! I can honesty say it is the first time in my life I have ever had two birthday cakes in one day! Told you I felt like quite the birthday princess....

Tuesday I had a hard time getting it in gear. Not sure if it was from all the excitement of the day before, or all the sugar! But I made myself get up and out the door to Bible Study anyway, then spent the entire afternoon on errands. It was great to just veg on the couch with hubby all evening.